Continue or stop psychedelic therapy?

Hi everyone,

Looking for some second opinions, insights or if anyone has a similar experience and what they did.

Here's some back story: I have dysthymia (persistent depressive disorder) and general anxiety. I'm pretty high functioning but struggle with depression and anxiety every single day. Ruminating and low-energy are especially challenging for me.

A couple years ago I gave anti-depressants a try. I tried 3 different types, I believe they worked at first but ultimately stopped because of the side effects : emotional blunting, lack of creativity (I'm a full time artist), zero interest in sex were amoung the biggest side effects. I also developed a histamine intolerance during this time. I never experienced this before in my life, and it started while being on antidepressants. I experience formication ( itchy, skin-crawling sensation) that came on every evening, or after strenuous exercise, stressful situations, and eating high-histamine foods.

I stopped meds a couple years ago, and have since have been trying psychedelics to help with these issues. I have also been seeing a therapist during this time who is experienced with psychedelic integration. I eat healthy, I exercise regularly, I don't drink alcohol, I meditate, I get about 8 hours of sleep every day.

I haven't tried a wide variety of psychedelics, so far just mushrooms (micro and macro doses) and LSD (micro only). I believe I've made progress in some areas of life with these tools, having deeper insights/realizations about myself that I was never able access while on anti-depressants. Actually, conceptual thinking was just not accessible while on the meds I tried.

But over these past couple years, I've still been struggling a lot to keep my head above water. I feel as though I'm spending most of time putting out little fires everywhere with my thoughts and emotions. I'm exhausted. I crave stability for longer than 1 week at a time. Anti-depressants in some way offered that, but with a lot of other downsides. I stopped micro dosing because it increases my anxiety too much (even at the teeniest dosages). Macro dosing was better, like I said it brought new perspectives, made maintaining healthy habits easier, quieted the rumination and incessantly negative thoughts. But the later lasted typically for about a month at a time. Mushrooms also cause my skin to itch a lot which is incredibly distracting during trip. Macro doses are also just more difficult to schedule into a busy life.

I did some research and it turns out there is a strong correlation between histamine and serotonin. Very complex stuff I don't full understand but it makes finding a complementary therapeutic very difficult. What won't cause my histamine levels to rise too much (histamine inflammation effects serotonin). Many people suffering from MCAS and depression are not put on SSRI's, but rather tricyclics for this. There is limited new research that SSRI's keep more histamine in the body, which might be why they stop working for some people. LSD might reduce immune response but research is very limited and again, given the trip duration, very hard to find time for.

Anyways, this is a long-winded post and I truly appreciate if you've read this far. I guess I'm wondering if psychedelic therapy is worth continuing if I am still struggling with daily life so much, despite all my efforts. If I choose to go on antidepressants again, the only psychedelic therapy I might be able to still use concurrently is Ketamine, which is still very inaccessible cost wise, and I don't feel very safe doing "at-home" with Internet drugs (I'm in Canada, there are no tele-health ketamine programs providing safe sources that I've found yet.) Does anyone have any considerations to offer that I haven't thought of? It is worth continuing psychedelic therapy given all these factors? Are there other options outside of what I've tried? What are your thoughts?